Welcome into the magic world of
via Umile 11 - PARMA
(my home-sweet-home)


Let me first introduce you my flat-mates: "la Flashetta" and "la Tosa"... These two girls come from a rather rich site of Italy called "TriVeneto" (TV), quite far from the region I come from. They usually call me with the nice nickname of "Terun" and I call them equally nicely "Magnapolenta". Those of you not acquainted with Italian culture will find some difficulty in understanding the meaning of these words but.. never mind. Go on!

So far you have understood that in via Umile 11 there are three people living continuously... but lots of people live there occasionally, as you will understand from the next photos. The previous picture was taken at nighttime while la Tosa was saying "I would like to have boobs as big as this", la Flashetta thinks "lucky me: I wouldn't have enough space left in our room...". Both are smiling but.... what happens in the morning??


La Flashetta can't start the day without a proper fix: she is proud of how she leaves the teaspoons so clean.


Army must go to University very early (9:00 AM): in this photo his eyes are fake, painted on eyelids, so he can keep sleeping until 11:30 and non one notices...


Here la Tosa was surprised in bed at 11:00 AM; she'll soon start to mash healthy seeds, stolen from birds in parks, and eat them for breakfast.

Why all this mess about the morning? Because in via Umile 11 you can't go to sleep before 3:00AM! Well, you may not believe but... have a look at what goes on at night... Fourty friends from Mexico gathered in via Umile 11 to have some Tequila+Beers.

The pot on the right contains 10Kg. of Chili con Carne, another pot has already been emptied. The man on the left is a well known alchool-addict working for Texas Instruments. The girl holding the Tequila bottle works for Barilla and is a tremendous stomach-ache-addict.

Not only people live in via Umile 11 but also other weird beasts. Two cats, named Paolo + Skinny, share the same flat and they usually complain because the weird beasts (la Flashetta, Army and la Tosa) meow to loud, leave hair around and piss outside the proper can. Paolo + Skinny appear in the next photo: they look at two strange beasts who have bought a single pijama to get a pair of trousers (left) and a shirt (right) at a smaller price.

The beast on the left, named Pietro, used to live in via Umile 11 until October '97. He has now moved because of the cats' complaints. Paolo and Skinny are here discussing how to get rid of the beast on the right.

But... there is a time for party and there is a time to work. Army does a really hard research job at the University and this job requires one to be serious, as you can see in the next photo. The cross-connection of legs is not a joke, it's required to attain the critical mass, necessary for the test.

He and his colleagues are testing the robustness of a staircase (the elevator on the left has to be tested yet). From left to right: Antonella, Pierro, Silvia"Legs", Army and Mo. The effort of such hard tasks is painted on each face.

In via Umile 11 we do love Cinema. The house is filled with posters of famous and not so famous movies; every guest is required, at least once in his life, to mime one of these. We have more than a hundred videotapes with lots of films and theater plays. Unfortunately we don't have a videotape player...

On the left, Silvietta "legs" is worried about war in Vietnam, on the right Army looks forward to have a different set of jaws.

One of our favourite guests is surely Ermanno Claypool. For several reasons: 1) he never tells you in advance when he's gonna arrive 2) often brings nice presents like books, cheese, wine, smoke... 3) when he's in via Umile 11 neither he nor you know when he's gonna leave (we hope as late as possible) 4) he can help us in annihilate a beer-box in one single night 5) no work can be made during the day when he's around.


Ermanno's feelings in this photo are: headache-toothache-"la Tosa sfiata"

Army lifts la Flashetta, his feelings are "stop pressing your tits on my back". Abi, on the left, looks astonished.

Another very occasional guest in via Umile 11 is "la Valdostrana" (the Valdostrange, for english-speaking people). Exaggerately tall with exaggerately long hair and an exaggerately sharp smile, she has an exaggerate number of CDs.

La Valdostrana has a deep knowledge of Paz and his art (by the way, you know who is Paz, don't you?). Just one advice: don't play dice with her!


O K, that's all so far. The creativity of the person standing on the table, called Epsilon, brought all that you've seen and read to you; the machine leaning on it (a sophisticated smoking robot) managed all the tchnical stuff, like doing the connections with your browser, sending data packets, running daemon programs and so on...





Now that you know what happens in via Umile 11 (look on the left), you can go back to Army's Hyperspace